Teaching in Malawi: Conversations & Revelations

I. A Conversation with a Student

“Is it wrong to be homosexual in America?”

It is not wrong to be homosexual anywhere.

“In Malawi, it is illegal.”

Just because something is illegal does not mean it is wrong.

“But in America, being gay, is it proper?”

It is as proper as not being gay.

(Uproar.)

*   *   *

II. A Conversation with a Class

“Mr. Lipton, what was wrong with your hair yesterday?”

“We saw you out the window and it was like WAH!” (gesturing ‘all over the place’)

Yeah, it gets a little crazy at the end of the day. It’s too long.

“No!”

Yes, I need to cut it, but I cannot find a barber who cuts white people hair.

“No, you must not cut it.”

“It looks proper this way.”

Long? Crazy?

“White.”

*   *   *

III. A Conversation with a Department Head

Am I right in understanding that there is a limit to how many students may sign up for a Form 6 class?

“There is a limit, yes.”

The limit is five?

“Yes, five.”

You cap Form 6 classes at five students?

“Yes, only five students. It is the limit. Why? How many do you have in there?”

Sixteen.

“Mm. That will be a challenge.”

*   *   *

IV. A Conversation with a Student

How does discipline work at this school?

“If you do not have discipline, you get punished.”

What sorts of punishments do they have?

“Chop down a tree. Dig a hole as big as yourself. That stuff.”

*   *   *

V. A Conversation with a Teacher

Is it true students have to chop down a tree as punishment?

“Yes. Usually it’s just water flowers. Or some mopping.”

Or dig a hole as big as yourself?

“That is for if they are caught dating.”