A Lilongwe Private School: Five Conversations

I. A Conversation with the Principal
You know, I have no experience teaching drama. In school, I studied theater and playwriting, but I've never taught it-

"Yes, okay, that is not a problem. You have never taught it, we have never offered it. We will learn together."

But teaching English, I have years of experience-

"English teachers, I have English teachers. It is my dream to have drama at this school. You, this class, you are seeds that we will plant, you, here, now. And four, five years, you will grow into a drama department at this school."

...Do we have copies of any plays?

"No."

*   *   *

II. A Conversation with Some Administrative Guy
"I have a very bad flu."

Oh, no.

"Yes, and malaria."

Oh...

"And here is a book you can use for taking attendance."

 *   *   *

III. A Conversation with a Different Administrative Guy
"How do you like the new schedule?"

I had eleven classes. Now I have nineteen.

"Yes. Here." (He hands me a pink folder.)

Thank you. Is there something I'm supposed to do with this?

"You put things in it."

 *   *   *

IV. A Conversation with a Class (Form 3)
"You must not eat anything you buy from the side of the road."

Why not?

"Because witches put juju in it and you will see things."

Really?

"Also, it is not sanitary."

*   *   *

V. A Conversation with a Class (Form 6)
So, in addition to drama, I have been hired to teach this group General Paper, but no one has told me what that is. Everyone says, "Yes, someone will explain that to you." I asked for a syllabus and everyone says, "Yes, someone will get that for you." But no one has. And finally, today, I said, "I have to teach General Paper today and I still don't have a syllabus." And they said they would print one for me, but there is another blackout today and so the printers cannot print.

"Welcome to Malawi."